Thursday, October 30, 2008

Just For MEN: WORSE for the Men's women

I kind of couldn't believe what was happening, but I was getting flack for purchasing this product....

It started out a  simple graphic design overall for the Just for Men brand.  But it became entirely something else...I'm purchasing this box of men's generic looking hair dye, so I take my box and approach the counter.  Let me tell you something about this Walgreens clerk, on Hennepin and 25th may I add, with a funky smile on his face and I thought he was just a normal working guy until,... 

The clerk looks at the box, then at me, then at the box again, and then he stares at me for a couple more seconds.  I then say, "HI?" in a questioning, what-are-you-doing sort of way.  He then says "Looks like a case of someone buying something for someone else."  I say "oh", and just look at him, and he looked back at me in the creepiest way I think I've ever been gazingly approached in.  

I stop and wonder now, a couple days later, if he would have continued to say what it sounded like he was going to say.  The 'gentleman' sounded as if he may head in the direction of my age.  I think if I'm buying a product for older men, that it may suggest that I am dating an older man.  And that's not just because I felt like I was indeed running an errand for my father.  What bothers me most about this strange counter-guarding fellow is that he's violated the sacred rules of making fun of people at your uneventful job...

Rule 1: Once they're gone, they're free game.
Rule 2:  You have to wait until they're gone!

And I thought everybody knew the rules!  I take the commentary of my friend working at a downtown hotel...
"When the movie they bought is over $20, you smile, wait until they leave, then immediately go to see what they rented.  It's fun to know what people are into."

-Secret front desk clerk

Monday, September 15, 2008

Ahhhhh- It must be a Joke

It has to be, in fact I believe it to be! But the more comments I read, and there are 90, the more I just can't tell if it's true...

It's probably not real yet, but this article on behalf of the New York Times is moer than frightening! It turns me into a liberatarian for this particular issue. It's called the sex tax. It is the story of an enforced taxation on sexual activity for all American citizens. It is written as being a solution for rising prices in medical and health care for everything from pregnancy to blood tests screening for HIV. This article tells of a tax in which we file the number of sexual partners we have, and what kind of sexual activity we participate in!

The way it works is... Married couples pay more. They are more likely to not use contraceptives, and more likely to begin a family; thus a rise in the population. The second highest bracket is undeterminable to me from the article. It would either be heterosexuals with more partners (they produce the spawn out of wedlock ya know-ha! this is ridiculous), or it would be homosexual-male couples who apparently rank highest in HIV positive testing. Regardless of whatever....

The more I thought it was a joke the more I laughed, but then... there were 90 comments. Then I read them...ALL. I couldn't believe it! It may actually be true. I went to class, and a foreign exchange student spoke of seeing it on the news! It can't be! Alas read the article yoursef! SEX TAX

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Granny Molly-The habits of

She's old, frail, sweet as sunshine on an arctic day, and best off she's my gran gran...sort of...

I watch gran do granny things, she nudges the doilies, she cleans a lot, she feeds me, and she randomly jars things. My gran is extra special though,...she nudges leopard-print doilies, she cleans her bong, she feeds me good-old fashioned chocolate chip cookies (slightly normal, and takes pride in her baking), and instead of jarring pickles and yams, my gran jars sidecars as that is her all time favorite drink.

"There's never a good time to run out of your favorite lazy vice my dear. You take a lesson now: primp your curls every morning, and make sure you got a good supply. Don't be jonsin' on a nice sunny side car day when you could've been sippin' like a champ."

She's my favorite. I sit on her gold and green couches.

"Pick good colors for your furniture, don't go gettin' out of style now,'s very important."

her cigarettes burn my lungs, but she makes them look beautiful with this long-stick thing, that she says is 'classic'. her voice is lower than pop pop wilbur's and the rasp that comes along is comforting.

"Here dear, hold gran's holder."

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

The Intimidation Fart

Many people have nervous twitches or nitchy things that happen when they're embarrassed etc.  I can't get over the intimidation fart...

It gets me every time.  I'm having a meeting and somebody farts loudly mid conversation.  This only happens to a handful of people, however I'm told it only happens around me.  What is it about me that makes people fart, or just generally extra gassy.  I feel the need to seek a specific answer from some medical journal, or newspaper.  Although I can't help seeking pure joy in coming up with my own theories.  

I theorize that the fart is a symbol of filling to the brim with explosive admiration, just kidding but funny though.  Seriously though!  How can I make people fart!  That doesn't even make any goddam sense!  But it's hilarious!  I wonder now what else I have the unknown ability for.  I wait to see if I'm capable of welling up the gas within people to force them to do my bidding.  Perhaps THIS is my X-Men power.

But for the mean time...I'll just consider myself queen of the intestinal track and call it a day.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

I DO want an office of Licorice whips...

It's true, we'd all be a little happier if the offices we worked in reminded us more of Candy Land...

But unfortunately they do not.  There will be no gum drop thinking caps today, no no.  Well we can dream, but what's interesting is people who ask you to think big because they are not allowed.  They're hoping that any awesome ideas you come up with can change their surroundings because such creativity can be blamed on immaturity to the business, yes that is interesting.

I found my self developing a wonderfully colorful plan to redesign the fun space for the creatives.  First the color choices went to the corporate site- they're very 90's.  Then we had to begin sneaking around and illegally doing stuff to make anything happen.  It just doesn't make any damn sense.  If a bunch of people want an office made of candy, ( this is in theory that it wouldn't attract disgusting bugs and deteriorate the building), then by GOD why the hell not give it to them.  The reasoning behind all the no's is just petty, and based on rules that don't necessarily apply to this environment.  I say we did make quite an attempt though.  We wanted a loft so we knocked out the ceiling.  Well we had support though, and that is the point.  You'd never coss your teacher, or your mentor, or your boss to have a small smile factor built in your surrounding.  However, you would go through with all the back-breaking work, the designing, the reforming, and the final product which makes you tired working on it, but you're happier with it than what used to exist.  You do it, because it's somewhat thrilling to be able to go through with something that nobody else had the motivation for, and nobody else wanted to do for the sake of doing something drastic in an environment desperate to grow.  

All I can say is this place is growing and the young one's as is traditional, are a major part of it.  this all does make me think though about the individual's ability to grow by staying in the same environment too long.  I think I'll be moving around.  

Tuesday, July 8, 2008


That's right, it's no lie.  I have become a ninja here at my place of business, and I am a level 10 master at sneaking large pieces of IKEA furniture without the facilities people ever knowing what hit them.

I AM a ninja- the interns have the task of redesigning the Think Tank or 'fun' room.  We thought it needed a new name, new kick-ass furniture, and a whole new attitude- color saturation, a bar, etc.  The point is that there are facilities people that control exactly what kind of furniture and anything goes in this place according to design and ethics code- bull shit bitch- we're drinkin'- off the job at least.

This project is decently fun and interesting to me because for the most part I get to just dec the shit out of a great space- and make it somewhere that I want to hang out and think.  The best part about it is that it proves that creatives do indeed live here.  It was both of my boss' ideas to give us a nice chunk of change to completely turn around the attitude of our beloved hang out, and more importantly they want to thrive in an environment that allows the power of play- so they're telling us that they care NOT about the trouble that they WILL be in, but to just go nuts and make a real theme.  I love it. There's nothing better than bringing together all your favorite patterns and furniture to make a place to make your colleagues your your friends; that's what this is really about.  It's a place to bond and spend time, and hide beer away from facilities people.  -Whatever we bought rock band, and I get to be an interior designer this week- dig it.- Plus Ping Pong will live forever in this joint- I'll make sure of that.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Will I become one...

I sift from professional to professional seeking and searching then I think about becoming that writer...

You notice them, the ones who desperately want to do everything themselves, and then you wonder...will I become one?  Have I already become one?  Or- am I just crazy?  I see a couple here and there- well not here necessarily- but I see them.  Are writers not team players?  Do most writers have problems collaborating their writing with other writers?  Am I a writer who is so territorial about the projects that I receive that I will refuse to accept a great Idea when I see one- specifically for the sake of owning it as only mine?  That makes me sick and sad because it just doesn't make any damn sense- for the project or anyone involved.  More so it doesn't make any sense for the 'shine' factor of the idea.  I did work with one when I first came here- this writer shot down everything I said before I could even get out the entire idea, and then they refused to come up with a variety of thinking patterns themselves.

It makes me worry- are writers more likely to fall into patterns of thinking in only one direction, and does that hurt the business that they're either in or working on?  I feel like it does, and I intend to be a team player- if not for the sake of starting any kind of conversation.
I find that the idea of 'the conversation' doesn't just refer to things like social media.  The conversation is the exchange of idea no matter how hard until the best is created in some form.  I think writers have a mush harder time grasping that- it means they must think inside not just their realm, but that of a few others as well.  A writer must be the all over thinker- because in the end the writing really means the thinking, and the thinking really means the communication of a great idea truly understood.